The Rules

A still from the film "The Ten Commandments" starring Charleton Heston as Moses. The image is of Moses holding one tablet with writing on it
  1. Avoid Chains (unless local to RI). Some places go to length to obscure that they are a chain or franchise, so it feels unavoidable, but for the most part, national chains, though they may have a healthy presence in Providence, are not part of eating a city. This is nothing against those places (seriously, ask me to describe Sheetz to you sometime, it'll sound like a cultist talking); in many ways they are the epitome of places where lived lives are lived lively, but the joy of a city is all the places you can experience only in that city. Restaurant groups and other corporatization, as long as they provide relatively unique experiences are fine--you'll find plenty of places that have sister restaurants in Newport or Boston. Once you've moved past three or four establishments that all share the same name and identity, though, I think it's no longer the business of food, but rather food as business. Exceptions are identities intrinsically tied to the state of Rhode Island (most of these are closed now but, for example, a Newport Creamery or Spike's Hot Dogs would've been fine in years past).
  2. Avoid Names. Part of memoir is that you've recruited a bunch of unwitting acquaintances as characters in your narrative, and sometimes the actual person, rather than the literary character, may take issue with the way you remember things or not have wanted a story to be told. But, equally, these things happened to me the way I recall them happening, and that is my story to tell. In an effort to balance these mutually exclusive demands, wherever possible I've given people pseudonyms (generally drawn from a literary source or two). Where it doesn't make a terribly lot of sense to preserve someone's anonymity, such as the owners of the places I visit, I haven't.
  3. This is Not a Review. I'm an opinionated asshole, but there are plenty of people who offer their full thoughts on food and dining around town. You can find all of them in other places, and I'm not here to actively endorse or disparage any restaurant, though my own preferences may occasionally shine through despite it all.